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Lost in Arizona

Taken from her Blog

Its late at night and I am trying to get home from Phoenix, AZ. Southern Nevada is like only 4 1/2 hours away. But if you miss one sign for the turn off, then that 4 hour trip starts getting longer. I was on, Go-Fast" energy drink to stay awake and stay focused on the highway. Some how I missed the turn off in the dark and the traffic. After about 90 minutes I started thinking that this part of the highway doesnt look familiar. Not one sign that pointed to Nevada.

Where am I? I finally get off the highway and start asking where I am and directions to where I am going. OMG.. I am like 90 miles going in the wrong direction. Well, Hells, Bells and Taco Shells! (I did say something a bit more crude and it wasn't like - Golly Gee Darn). It was more like %(&(^%##$%#$%&&**.

So now I have to add more gas ($3.70 per gallon) and double back 90 miles. This once 4 hour trip is now turning into a 7 hour tour of Arizona. Now I am looking for Ginger, Marianne, the Skipper and Gilligan.

I was already tired from the Live Performance earlier in the day at the Phoenix Pride Festival. It was 100 degrees and on stage with the lights can crank it up to 150 degrees real quick.

Finally I am on the right highway headed west towards Nevada again. Hey, this looks weird, why is the highway more narrow than before when I came through here. It feels like my rig has gotten wider or the highway has gotten more narrow. OMG I am tired. It is now like midnight and I am still 2 hours away from the Nevada border and home.

I have been driving for 37 years and can drive the hell out of a vehicle pulling a trailer. But I see a scary spot coming up. The highway narrows on both directions going over a ravine of some sorts. No! Coming in the other direction is an 18 wheeler and we are both going to be on the narrow part of this mini bridge at the same time traveling 65 mph in two different directions.
That truck flew by be and it's wind currents pushed me over, NO! I look in the mirror and I am within inches of scraping the side railing with my trailer. There is enough lights on the trailer to see the guard rail. MOMMA! Whoa, that was close!

I now have a massive headache and I find a lighted Gas Station that is closed. I'll go in there for a few minutes and stop to catch my breath. I look in my purse for an Aleve. What? No Aleve? Just then a Sheriff's car pulls in. I walk over to this officer and ask if he had an aspirin or something for a headache. I then got a speech about how aspirin are not good for me. OMG, how do I shut this cop up.

Okay, okay.. I finally find a good excuse to stop the aspirin speech. I said I have to go potty. The Deputy says there is a gas station open about 5 miles up the road.

I thank him and drive away. I find the gas station and it has a mini mart inside, Yay! I grab a couple travel packets of Advil. Now I am recognized and I quickly sign a couple autographs and scurry back to my vehicle. I dont want to sign any more autographs. It's after midnight and I am getting short with people by this time. I have a headache that wont stop, My make up melted away on stage hours ago and I dont want to spray perfume on me.

2 hours later I finally crossed the Arizona/Nevada border. Yay, I am home now. What a long day it was. I started at 6:00am on Sunday morning and went to Phoenix for a Live Concert. Now it is 2:00am Monday morning and I am finally back at home exhausted. The SUT (Sport Utility Truck) and the trailer will be emptied out after I get a good night's sleep. I cant see straight and my eyes are about to shut on me.

I look at my bed and I am thinking I need a shower and then put on my nitey. Ahh, the hell with that. I fall on the bed and slept for about 7 hours, clothes and all.

I woke up wearing yesterday's clothes (Yuk) and I was zoning for the remainder of the day. Not even a good shower and a full pot of coffee seem to get me out of my vegetable state of mind.

I think I will be a black haired blonde today. Hmm, I wonder why?

Taken from her Blog.

Next Time, I'll walk

Okay, So the Native American Music Awards is like in Hollywood Florida. I live in Nevada and that means I have to fly. I am Nominated for an award so I gotta be there. OMG! I am scared to death of flying. I have had nothing but bad luck and when I fly, I know my days are numbered. Flying is not my thing. But, but the Award Show is in Florida and that means I have to fly. OMG NO!
Driving will take me over 5 days to get there. By train will take to long as well. That means I will have to fly.
So I pack my luggage and head for Florida. The flight there was kinda nice considering I needed a Valium and didn't have any. I get off the plane and instantly my sunglasses fog up. WTF? I cant see and I cant breath. 80% humidity is already killing me and I haven't been in Florida for 15 seconds. How in the hell do people live in this kind of weather? Their lungs have got to be half full of moisture. I set up camp at the Hollywood Hard Rock Hotel/Casino (yeah, same place Anna Nicole Smith died). Went to the show, talk to celebs that I knew, shook hands and sign autographs with fans.

The weatherman says there is a Tropical storm brewing on the same day I am leaving back for Nevada. They are expecting very high winds and massive rain.
The Rain Gods made sure the storm got here at about the same time I boarded the plane. OMG where is my Valium at? I can't see a thing out the window because it is raining so hard.

Some how the plane lifts off the runway and we are headed for Atlanta. Now this plane is turning into a roller coaster ride. The kids are yelling, "Wee" and I am yelling OMG!
Just then I hear the Captain say on the intercom, "Ladies and Gentlemen, we are on our final approach to Atlanta International." FINAL APPROACH? What the hell does FINAL APPROACH mean? Did we run out of the other approaches and this is the final one? If we don't make it on this final approach does it mean it is the end? SAVE ME! I want off this plane NOW! Wait! I think we are landing ... Damn, what a bumpy runway, Hey! Why are we like traveling sideways on the runway? Whoa! We are now sliding back the other way. OMG, We are hydroplaning on the runway due to all the water from the Tropical storm. STOP THIS PLANE!

I think I broke some nails with that landing of the plane. I look at the other passengers and I can see in their eyes that this was not a good landing. Having this plane hydroplane side to side at 300 mph is an experience I will not soon forget.
Now I have to switch planes to get to Nevada. OMG not another plane. What was that? The Airport is shut down because there is too much water on the runway? Its like totally flooded? Well I could have told them that. We landed on the lake out there and we didnt have a plane with pontoons.

Okay, well I better find a place to sit and wait it out. No place to sit? People are now sitting in the aisles and against walls in hall ways. I need a drink! Hey, there is an airport bar. I will go have a drink to calm my nerves. No place to sit in the bar and I can't even get in with so many people, damn. Just then a waitress recognizes me and squeezes me into the bar. Another person also recognizes me and he gives me his seat and stands next to me. Now people are buying me drinks and it only cost me a hand shake or an autograph. There is salvation after all.

YAY for people who know who I am. Now this is where being a recording artist/celebrity pays off. Free Drinks and a chair to sit in a shut down international airport. Oh whoa, I have a free tab and all I can drink paid by some guy I dont even know. Jack Daniels and Beer here I come!
Okay, I am toasted now. This was better than a Valium. I hear that the airport is now open again after 5 hours. The excess water has been removed from the lake outside (runway) and planes can fly again. Tropical Storm Oberto sux big ones!

Okay, I am now seeing blur from all the booze I drank during the last 5 hours. I said goodbye to everyone there and they all waved to me. Wow, felt like I knew everyone in the Sardine can of a bar there. People from all over the world. I had a bunch of CD's in my suitcase and I just passed them out to everyone I could before I left. It was the least I could do. I mean, after all I am toasted and I got in without having to wait in line and I had a free tab.

Now I am so drunk I dont care if the plane flies backwards. I spent the remainder of the flight burry eyed and we left the storm hundreds of miles back east.

I walk outside the airport in Las Vegas (McCarran International) and it is like 105 degrees and the humidity is like 3%. Ahh yes, dry air to breathe. No foggy sunglasses. No wet clothes. YAY!

I was sober by the time we landed or almost sober I think. So the 100 mile drive from Las Vegas to home was a piece of cake.

Next time I have to fly, I'll just walk thank you.

The Horse Stall is Ready and the Animals are listening

I have played and performed in some of the Best places on earth and the people have been absolutely great. But, I have also performed in some of the worst holes in the ground and would never return. From a little town called, Dayton, Nevada., where there was a Grand Opening and no one came (literally). I did performed for 3 Mexicans in a truck who were waiting for their clothes to dry in the Laundromat next door, to a Renaissance Fair that put me in a spot that a horse would stay in. 

The Fair:  I had stated in my Rider Contract that there would be a stage. The Organization agreed to the terms for the fair performance. When I arrived, I was placed behind a tractor on a piece of 4X8 plywood on the floor as my stage. Well, I am easy to get along with and I had asked to be placed someplace else. So, they proceeded to place me in a Horse Stall facing the crowd. A Horse Stall? Dumb me, I agreed. Why I would do that is beyond me. It wasn't the money that is for sure.

The next day I arrived to perform and then I saw that a Vendor had erected a huge tent in front of the stall. Well, that wasn't going to work. So they tried once again to place the make shift stage (slab of plywood) behind the entire event and again, behind this damn tractor. Finally, I said that this is not going to work and that I was done and leaving without performing. I never returned to that event.

Like I have stated. I have performed on some fantastic stages and even in front of stores where no-one showed up. I think what is worse than that is when one shows up for a performance as I did at the Reno Convention Center, "Psychic Fair" and they had no stage at all and totally forgotten that I was under contract to perform. I re-packed my vehicle and went home. They had the Gaul to ask me to perform again later during the year and this time, I tripled the performance fees and my rider contract was jammed with everything I could think of. Of course it was way out of their budget by now and that is how it remained to this day.

I love performing, I think every Musician wants to shine when they perform. I was contracted to perform at the Dixon County Fair in Dixon, CA. There were big Country Artist who had the Main Stage and I was told that the Secondary stage was a good spot. I accepted the terms and when I arrived to perform, I found the stage on the outskirts of the Fair behind the Farm Animals. It was obvious that no one was going to find the stage or even want to travel through all the animals to get to the stage to watch a performance. Thoughts were going through my head. Country Music on the Main Stage, Native American/New Age Music by the Delivery Entrance out in the back 40 acres, how ironic. I performed as was stated on my contract and looked out over the stage to 20 people max as they sat and listened. 100,000 people attended the Fair in Dixon and the Stage was so far out of the Fair grounds that I had maybe 20 people who attended my performance (I think most were Maintenance Workers taking a break). They did applaud! Well, I know the farm animals loved the music at least.

I am an easy person to get along with as long as I am respected and treated fairly. I don't do Grand Openings anymore, I don't perform at Renaissance fairs and the Event Coordinators have to have a descent budget. I don't play the back 40 acres anymore at County Fairs. I am either on the Main Stage or I stay home. That is so much easier and I get to keep my respect.

... if you play, they will come!

I have seen things that I would have never thought could happen. I was performing a evening Concert at a Renaissance Fair and it was called, "Renaissance Under the Stars". About 100 people showed up and the Sunset next the to (The foothills) Sierra Nevada Mountains was Breath taking on a warm July night.

I had performed several easy Native American songs and was just starting to perform a New Age number when out of the corner of my eye I saw a herd of deer coming in my direction. I told everyone to please stay still and don't move. Many of the Audience people didn't have a clue of what I was talking about and requesting. I sang another Native song in my native language "Hail to the Father" and the deer approached the low stage. The deer totally ignored the audience that sat there in total awe. There was some grass at the foot of the low level stage and they started eating and grazing. I was as shocked as the audience as I continued to perform the song. People started taking pictures as I finished up the song. I blessed the deer and went into another song. Then the small herd left as I started to Perform a New Age song. When it was all clear, people started to ask me which Album songs brought the Deer to the stage. I told them, "Liquid Visions" and people quickly were purchasing the Album.

It was a beautiful night to remember under the stars in the foothills of the Sierra Nevada Mountains. Those are performances worth remembering for life.

No one has asked me about the farm yet

I had performed every year at the Reno Hilton (Reno, Nevada) for the International World "Aids Day". I wanted to help in finding a cure for Aids. Performing for the Organization is one way of doing just that. After a show, I was asked how long? I asked backed, How long what? How long have you been HIV Positive? What? I am not HIV Positive! Oh? Well since you were playing here I thought you were. This question has been asked of me year after year. I also had Performed year after year at the Reno and Sacramento Gay Pride Festivals. After the shows I get the same question. So, how long? How Long What I would ask back. When did you come out of the closet? Closet? I am not a Lesbian! Oh Sorry, I thought you were because your performing here. I haven't performed at a "Aids" or "Pride" Festival in some time now.

Now, I have also performed for the Farm Aid people to help the Farmers and I am still waiting for some one to ask me.... So, how Long? How Long What?